Better late than never

I just recently decided what my New Year's Resolutions should be for the coming year. I found paperwork dating back at least five years that informed me that for those said five years, my resolutions have been exactly the same each year. Obviously I need a different approach. Previously they have been:

• quit smoking
• put money into a savings account on a regular basis
• drink more water

Resolutions have now been changed to this:

• quit dating sociopaths (they actually cause cancer as well plus make you want to smoke more)
• carry cash more often and only use debit card for big purchases- I paid nearly $1,ooo dollars in overdraft fees in 2007 due to not keeping track of small purchases like gas and cigarettes.
• just drink more. period.